This particular write-up lay emphasis on things couples or better still husband and wife must not do after marriage If they want their marriage to sustain. This should apply to both men and women.
Do not wait to show your true color until after you are married. Either the man or woman will start to think that he/she was duped into marrying the wrong person. Some will stay. Some will leave. Many men and women do let the other do whatever he/she wants until they are married. Then they exercise their controls over their lifestyle because the person is legally trapped. This is just wrong and unfair to the man or the woman. Let him/her fall in love with your true self. If you have issues being your true self, then seek therapy and love yourself more. Your goal in life should not be a diamond ring and wedding or some babies to trap a wealthy man for life but a healthy marriage with emotionally healthy children. A man's goal also should not trap a sugar mama. By hiding your true color, you are not only going to have an unhappy marriage but also unhappy kids. Then kids will be emotionally messed up adults. The future of the world always depends on what kind of parents a child has. Be authentic since day 1.
Do not alienate your friends. Many married people get too busy with their married life that they forget their friends. One day they wake up and realize that they need a friend but no one else is around. Make sure to keep in touch with your friends.
Do not set up your single friends with your spouse's friends, relatives or colleagues. Just because you are married that does not mean that the whole world has to be married. They might want to experience that butterfly feeling and the love at first sight experience without your intervention or your seeing them first. for your future children.
Treat your in-laws with the same respect and compassion you'd give to your blood family. You're now one of them. They share the blood and genes with your spouse and children. Don't make them treat you poorly either by being too compliant. Instead be honest and more assertive yet friendly and kind. Your mother in law is not your enemy and is the woman who gave birth tho the person you married. Try to put yourself in her shoes every time you try to hate her as a parent to another parent. If you don't, your son/daughter in law will hate you too. Try to build a good relationship with her so that your children will grow up in a healthy environment.
Treat sex as a priority in your marriage no matter what. Many children were conceived during Hurricane Sandy when there was no power. Yes you should not have any excuse either. This is the most intimate thing you can offer to your spouse that he/she can ethically get only from you. Never withdraw or deny sex. Never use sex to manipulate the other person which will only lead to resentments.
Spend 15 mins undivided attention to each other every day. Sit face to face. Hold both hands, look into the eyes and just talk. Don't think. Don't plan topics. Just talk about anything without filtering. Do talk about your innermost deep wounds. Childhood pain. Most painful breakups. Most embarrassing thing you've experienced. Your day. Your fear. Your complaints. Your concerns. Your needs. Conflicts. Issues. This will strengthen the bond between two. Keep the communication going without pointing fingers.
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