Having a healthy relationship is not synonymous with a perfect relationship . In fact, having conflicts and arguments with your partner is common and even inevitable. But the key is not in the absence of the problems, but in the work and the will to solve them . But, before I give you some tips so you can start analyzing your ties and discovering if you need to work more or less on your relationship, do you really know what it means to have a healthy relationship?
What is a healthy relationship?
As we have already told you before, a healthy relationship should not be an idealization of the perfect relationship . The bond is defined primarily by the presence of mutual trust, communication, and respect . That is, it is a relationship in which the members do not feel constantly threatened and there is balance and peace for a significant part of the time. Again, we remind you that this does not imply that there are no conflicts from time to time, but rather that the involvement of both allows you to talk and resolve the tension that may have been generated (whether or not they have reached an agreement). Next, we want to give you some useful advice that anyone who is in a relationship or wants to work for a healthy relationship must keep in mind. Now, we will tell you the fundamental elements to create and maintain a healthy and beneficial bond for both of you. The reality is that all these elements are important in their own way and therefore none of them should be dispensed with. Here we go!
1. Do not idealize your partner or the relationship
Most of us tend to create an idyllic image of our partner when we start a romantic relationship. This is because at the beginning of relationships, in the infatuation stage, people tend to show only what the other wants to see. We are more affectionate, close and intense. However, in the next stage is when we really show ourselves as we are . And it is at that point where disappointments may (or may not) come. For this reason it is so important not to build an image of your partner in a hasty and idealized way. Because that construction that you have created for yourself does not reflect the complete reality of the person next to you. And this can lead to erroneous expectations and disappointments that lead to later conflicts. Be careful, it is important to know that this is done unconsciously and with the best will of the parties, no one wants to deceive anyone!
2. Accept your differences and remain independent
A relationship is still made up of two different people. Two individuals with different preferences, characters, and personalities. So, in situations where differences arise, this must always be kept in mind. In relation to all this, it is essential to preserve independence in the couple . The fact of having a relationship should not make your most characteristic personal traits fade, much less that you both put aside your life as independent people.
3. Work on trust and emotional responsibility
The trust is another key to maintaining a healthy relationship. Feeling safe and supported in the relationship is vital to achieve that stability that we talked about earlier. Thus, you can always count on the other person for whatever is necessary, with the certainty that they will be willing to accompany you if necessary. And another element that must not be forgotten is emotional responsibility , that is, the ability to be aware that our actions (or the absence of these because, remember, what is not said does not exist) will have an effect on our partner. From the moment a bond develops, there is already emotional responsibility.Couple on the beach
4. Focus on the present
As we have already explained to you, a relationship is made up of two individual people . This means that both have a past and other stories that they have experienced throughout their lives. In addition, conflicts arise in relationships that are later resolved . It's natural. But the important thing about all this is that, whether there have been conflicts in the past of the relationship or if the other person had experiences before you, you must focus on the present . Solving problems also means not using them as an argument at critical moments. You have to live in the present.
5. Communication as your best ally
And at the core of everything we've just told you is communication. Talking with your partner, expressing your concerns and complaints, in the same way as all the positive things you experience in your relationship, will allow you to develop all the elements . Express directly what you feel when you need it. And, on the part of your partner, it is also important that you feel their predisposition to listen to you and understand you . Thus communication will be born in a fluid and natural way.
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