keeping a guy interested is a different story. Time and time again, they fall hard, but they don’t stick. You wonder if it’s you, if you’re doing something wrong. If a relationship starts from a healthy place- both people are emotionally healthy, want the same thing, share the same values then it will most likely last. If it starts off with a bad foundation, it probably won’t. At the end of the day, if you’re fundamentally incompatible or not on the same wavelength (meaning you don’t want the same kind of relationship), then it’s not going to work and no amount of rules is going to change that.
And with that, here is exactly how to keep a man interested in you:
1. Show interest in his interests
One thing men crave more than anything else is a woman who seeks to understand them, a woman who really sees him and appreciates him. One easy way to get there is to show genuine interest in his interests. You don’t have to love what he loves, and he wouldn’t expect you to. But a man loves being able to share his passions with a woman who is excited by them. Ask him about the things he enjoys and really listen for the answers, follow up with more questions. Ask him to take you to see his favorite band, or watch his favorite movie.
If you fake this then you’re just playing a game and it won’t work and will probably push him away instead. It has to be a real, genuine interest. If you can’t summon any ounce of interest, then why are you with a guy who doesn’t interest you? Most women just don’t get it. The expect things or they don’t notice things or they don’t take a minute to step outside of themselves and see the intention behind an action. They are so worried about being blindsided in the relationship that they focus on his actions (specifically, the actions that show his level of commitment), and don’t take the time to look at who he is as a person.
2. Men want to be seen and appreciated for who they are. And no man is ever going to come right out and ask you for this, it’s on you to know it. And now you do! Don’t just expect him to do things for you, appreciate him for it, for things big and small. Appreciate the things he does as well as, and even more importantly, the person he is.
3. Accept that sometimes men need space. This messes women up all the time. You’re seeing a guy, all seems to be going well, and then suddenly he’s not as interested or attentive anymore. He just doesn’t seem as excited by your very existence as he did in the beginning. Is he losing interest? It’s possible. But what’s even more possible is he just needs a little space for whatever reason. You panic and think you did something wrong, that you did something to push him away. So you do everything in your power to bring him back which only succeeds in pushing him further away. In your attempt to solve the problem, you have become the problem that he now needs to get away from. Sometimes guys need space, it’s natural and normal and seriously, no big deal. It becomes a big deal when you can’t handle it and smother him to get his interest back. That’s when he legitimately starts losing interest and re-thinking the relationship. Accept him for who he is without demanding him to change to meet your needs. Sometimes he’ll need things that you aren’t happy with, but you still need to respect that this is what he needs and that he is an independent person and isn’t on this earth only to serve you.
4. Have a life outside of the relationship
Don’t be one of those girls who falls off the map the second she gets a boyfriend. Keep doing whatever you were doing before he came along. Spend time with friends, pursue your hobbies, have a full and well-balanced life. As a relationship deepens your lives will merge more and more, but it’s important to also have that separate time because it makes coming back together more exciting. This is also what enables you to bring happiness into the relationship instead of extracting happiness from the relationship, a common mistake many people make.
The fact is, the best way to keep a guy interested is to be interesting. The best way to be interesting is to fill your life with many interests. He was initially drawn to you because you had a lot going on in your life, so don’t stop being that person. As romantic as the idea of being someone’s “whole world” is, it’s just not realistic. No one can ever be someone’s everything.
5. Love yourself
Nothing sexier to a man than a confident woman who absolutely loves herself and loves her life. This is all it really comes down to if you want to keep a man interested in your for the long haul
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